ThrillerFest Wants Me

At least, that’s what the email says. They want me. To register. And attend.

Wish I could.

The email opens with this message:

“150 killers, kidnappers, spies & trouble makers decend on NYC for ThrillerFest 2007.”

One might think, “Poor New York City.” Or, “How would they know the difference?” It depends on your point of view.

I’d love to attend, but I don’t have either the money or the time to get there. I also don’t have the desire to get into a plane yet. I guess it take some of us a bit longer than others to trust airline safety.

So I’ll stay at home and read blogs and hope that someone who does go will blog about it. Often.

Is anyone planning to go?

Grammar on the Go

There may be hope for our ever-struggling English language in this electronic age that has spawned an annoyingly non-grammatical sub-language: the Podcast.

Technical writer Mignon Fogarty started a grammar tips podcast and has been surprised to see it shoot up all the way to the number two slot on Apple’s iTunes. Interviewed in the July edition of The Writer, Fogarty says, “It just hit me that grammar was something that I had expertise in that would lend itself to a short tip-based podcast.”

Since her “Grammar Girl’s Quick & Dirty Tips for Better Writing” launched last July, it has been downloaded more than 1.3 million times!

It’s good to know that there is an interest in writing well.

(More info on her podcast at http://grammar.qdnow.com.)

Thriller School

The advertisement in today’s Publishers Lunch newsletter caught my eye immediately:

Come to Thriller School

Want to improve your craft? Focus on dialog. Plotting. Research? Making a continuing character work? Have lunch with an agent? Or 20? (Yes, everyone will have an agent their table.)

Sounds great. Until I read that it’s in New York City during ThrillerFest in July. I’m hoping that ThrillerFest eventually makes it down south. There are scary things in, say, Atlanta or Charlotte.

Computer Scare

As some of you might know, I like to write out of the house using an old Macintosh laptop. That caused me a bit of a headache earlier today.

I took my trusty old laptop to a local Mexican restaurant with the intention of writing during lunch. When I opened the laptop, the desktop was grayed out and there was a strange error message telling me that some kind of serious error had occurred and that I needed to power down the computer at once. (If the computer is smart enough to know that an error serious enough to prevent me from doing anything but powering it down has occurred, it should at least be smart enough to power itself down and save me the trouble.) Anyway, I held down the power button, as it instructed, and nothing happened. It stayed on, with the error message taunting me.

After trying holding down the power button several times to no avail, I just took out the battery. That did the trick.

But the joke was on me: when I tried to restart the computer, nothing happened. No error message, no Mac error screen, no gray screen of nothingness (besides gray), no blinking question mark. Not even a flicker from the green power light.

I immediately heard a line of dialog in my head. The line in question came from a climactic scene in Dean Koontz’s Tick Tock, in which a demon attempts to break into the home of the Vietnamese woman who created it:

“This not good.”

It was more than “not good.” There on the laptop’s hard drive, which I can get to do nothing, are four chapters of my novel I’ve been working on (and re-working) over the past two months, when my Sweeps-drained brain found time and desire to actually work on it.

I tried the old pep talk that seems so appropriate at times like this: “It’ll come back on. I’ll just plug it in and give it a few minutes.”

Didn’t work.

Then I tried the second pep talk strategy: “If I sit down with the last few chapters, I’m sure I’ll remember exactly what was there. It’ll all come back to me with no problem.”

I wasn’t buying that one, either.

So I called a couple of computer repair centers and asked around. I’m not sure exactly how old this particular model of Powerbook is, but it is old enough that no computer repair stores or even the Apple Store itself will even bother to service it if something goes wrong.

I can understand Apple taking this position: they want me to buy a new computer. Got that. But it surprised me to find out that computer repair companies would be likely to turn me down as well. When I asked about this, it was explained to me that the parts are either hard to find or outrageously expensive -- if not both -- and I would be better off just to replace the machine. But one local guy offered to salvage what was on the hard drive this afternoon.

Holiday service? At no additional cost? This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship!

I met up with him and he was able to get those chapters to my trusty thumb drive. As he worked, I noticed that he transferred the files I needed into a folder on his laptop, and then from there onto my thumb drive. His laptop, I was surprised to discover, is a MacBook Pro.

“I’m impressed,” I said. “Most IT guys I know hate Macs. You’re the first one I’ve ever met who had a Mac laptop.”

“I wouldn’t trust one who didn’t.”

I love this guy.

After making sure the files actually made it to the thumb drive and deleting them from his computer (yes, I saw him!), he tinkered with the computer and was able to perform a “Power Management Reset” -- whatever that’s supposed to be -- and the machine actually came back to life. Bonus!

He did advise me to start shopping for a new laptop. He suggested the models to consider, and that the base model would be more than enough for what I needed. So eventually, I guess I’ll have to get something new. For now, though, I’m back in business. For a lot cheaper than it would have been otherwise.

So all you writers out there, kindly consider this as that friendly tap on the shoulder, a reminder to save everything, then backup everything to floppy disk or CD so that if your computer dies, your writing projects aren’t lost.

That’s my next task, too.

25 Historic Titles

USA Today recently published a list of the 25 Most Memorable Books of the last quarter-century. Leading the list, as you might guess, is the first Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone.

I must admit feeling pretty culturally-literate at the moment: I’ve actually heard of every book on the list. I haven’t read most of them, mind you, but I’ve at least heard of them.

I Want One of These!

Brett Battles posted a T-shirt he found at the Los Angeles Times Festival of Books:



I’d wear it proudly!

About Time

I’ve been having trouble with my work-in-progress. Not the end-of-the-world problems I’ve experienced in the past, but some annoyances with plot holes that have had me spinning my writing wheels, waiting for a perfect solution to drop magically out of the sky and into my laptop. Or onto my legal pad among all my scribbling.

Naturally, it didn’t happen quite that way.

But a solution did appear, and I had one of my rewriting phases where I had to go back and work on earlier chapters when what I really wanted to do was to keep moving forward with newer chapters. And just when it looked like I was going to have to add a chapter in between the second and third chapters, which would have thrown off a lot of my file numbering and made my few OCD tendencies go off the deep end, I found a way to accomplish everything an extra chapter would have accomplished with the addition of only a few sentences to my newly-rewritten second chapter.

So now I am ready to move forward again, with a foundation of loose ends that will be far easier to tie up as I approach the proper time for that. The writing process, for me, is both pleasing and painful. I write a page or two, decide that it’s not going anywhere near where I want it to go, or that it’s forcing me in a different direction I hadn’t planned for, which then makes me want to stop and re-plot a few details.

It’s a lot easier, when I’m in the overly-critical mood, to just not write. But no one ever got published that way, did they?

My biggest weakness as a novelist -- an as-yet unpublished novelist, thank you -- is not being able to easily overcome the desire to stop writing when I hit a road block in my plot. There are other writers, some successful, some not, who are able to just keep writing with the confidence that they will be able to easily remedy whatever ails their manuscript when they get to “The End.” Maybe I could do the same thing...but I don’t think so. Once I know I’m headed for a plot hole, if I try to keep on plodding away, I tend to overcompensate, creating a situation that makes the manuscript worse; when I do eventually solve the problem, I have to go back and rewrite everything past the original roadblock, anyway. So I figure that I’m no worse off putting the writing on hold to rethink a problem, and I actually think I’m sometimes better off by not trying to pretend the problem wasn’t there.

There are those writers -- ones who, in my opinion, come off as “snobs” at times -- who might suggest that if I can’t just sit down at the keyboard and pound out a first draft without stopping, or if I can’t complete a novel within a fixed amount of time, (and that length of time varies from person to person) I will never be a success at writing.

As I get older, I worry less and less about those opinions. I respect them, because that mentality has apparently worked for them. But all writers are different. And until I find myself on some publisher’s deadline, I find that I produce a better effort when I don’t force myself to stick to a deadline of my own design.

Maybe they’re right: maybe I’ll never get published that way. But if I get more enjoyment out of writing at a slower pace, solving problems as I go rather than after I have compiled such a heap of crap that I have to end up rewriting from the beginning, I think that’s a pretty good trade-off.

Neither a Lender Nor a Borrower Be

That is, unless you're in a library.



1. Do you lend your books to other people? If so, any restrictions?

Not if I can help it. If I do, my restrictions are that the person be gentle with the spine of the book and use bookmarks. (I hate dog-eared corners.) I apparently tend to treat my books much more gently than the average used book store customer

2. Do you borrow books from other people? (Friends or family—I'm not talking about the public library)

I don't have that many friends who read that often! I wouldn't object to borrowing a book from a friend, but because lending my books isn't something I like to do, I never ask to borrow a book. If it's one I want to read badly enough, I'll make note of it and look for it at the book store.

3. And, most importantly—do the books you lend/borrow get returned to their rightful owners??

If I borrow a book, I return it. I explain in advance that I'm not a read-a-book-in-a-single-night kind of guy, and make sure the lender understands that I'll take a little while to get the book finished. The last book I lent someone never made it back to me, and the person ended up relocating, which is one more reason that I tend not to be a book lender.

Click here to play along with Booking Through Thursday.

Freedom to Read

Last week, apparently, was Freedom to Read Week, a celebration of banned books that have still managed to make an impact on our culture despite the fact that they were once (or still are) banned from schools or libraries.

The Fahrenheit 451: Banned Books blog is still offering a challenge for readers to declare the number of banned books they intend to read between now and the end of June. You can find out more about the challenge here.

Whether you sign up or not, I thought I'd turn the topic into a quickie little book meme. It's just three questions in length, so it shouldn't take a great deal of time to do. Answer here or leave a link to your blog if you'd rather answer there. And you'll probably want to have a look at "The Forbidden Library's" official banned books list for options.

1. Of the books listed, which would you consider your favorite?

2. Of the books listed, which one (if any) was the most recent one you read?

3. If you had to pick one book from the list to be the next book you'd read, which one would you most likely choose?

As for my answers, I would have a hard time picking my favorite. The religious part of me wishes to quickly claim the Bible. The horror/suspense writer in me prefers King's Different Seasons. The literary snob in me thinks I should choose something more historic than Stephen King, like The Grapes of Wrath. If I go with my own personal tastes, I'm more likely to go with Different Seasons, because I do think it's some of King's best.

The listed book I have most recently completed was Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451.

If I had to pick a book that I have not yet read, and I'm almost ashamed to admit that I haven't already read it, yet -- I guess my English teachers were pushing other "big name" books, instead -- it would be To Kill a Mockingbird.

Leave your comments and then enjoy some "forbidden fiction."

A Novelist in the Family

In my last post, I mentioned that I had abandoned Stephen King's latest novel, Lisey's Story, for a debut novel, The Heart-Shaped Box, by Joe Hill.

I received this comment from Robin in Texas:

"Patrick, did you know that Joe Hill is Stephen Kings son? I saw him on [Good Morning America] last week. How funny that you set aside a book by the father and chose, perhaps unknowingly, to read one written by his son."

I did miss the interview: I'm a Today man, myself. But I do think it's ironic, and I immediately began wondering why I didn't know that Hill is King's son. I immediately looked at Joe Hill's website. I couldn't find any mention of the famous father there. Then I looked in the next-most obvious place: the book jacket from the novel:

"A multiple award winner for his short fiction, author Joe Hill immediately vaults into the top echelon of dark fantasists with a blood-chilling roller-coaster ride of a novel, a masterwork brimming with relentless thrill and acid terror.

"Joe Hill is the author of the acclaimed story collection 20th Century Ghosts. He lives in New England."

Even John Scalzi's recent author interview with Hill makes no mention of Stephen King.

So now maybe the question is no longer, "Why didn't I know," but now, "How could I have known?"

That leads me to another question: if you're a debut novelist and your father happens to be one of the most popular novelists in the world, would you hide that fact? Would you assume from the start that everyone already knew? Do you think it would come up in conversation, at least in the first interviews you did? Wouldn't you make mention of it on your website? And wouldn't you think your publisher would be sure to mention it as a selling point in terms of one writer's work being influenced by such a prolific one?

Not that it wouldn't cause pressure for the debut novelist. But I would think that pressure would always be there, anyway, even if the world didn't know who the father happened to be.

I just find it odd that it seems the fact is being either ignored or hidden.

By the way, I am enjoying Heart-Shaped Box so far. I don't think I'll be setting it aside because of a lot of inside, meaningless lingo.

I Tried...I Really Tried

Earlier, I mentioned that I was having a hard time struggling through Stephen King's latest novel, Lisey's Story.

In particular, the far-too-numerous appearances of a euphemism for the f-word, an "inside joke" between the book's two main characters, was getting on my nerves. I decided I'd stick with it a little longer to see if it got less annoying.

Then, while that little word's appearances grew less numerous, more words and phrases, like bools and "strapping it on" have become more and more frequent. Eventually, I have some lingering confidence, there will be a clear explanation of what the hell these little ditties mean. But I'm tired of sitting through them while I wait.

I feel like I'm attending a party of close friends who are speaking in their own little code built from shared experience, and I'm forced to nudge someone next to me to explain what they're talking about. The problem is that as a reader, there's no one to nudge.

It may be the greatest novel King has ever produced. If so, I guess I'll just miss out. After lasting through the first 129 of 509 pages, I just can't take it any more. And despite my frustration and my general lack of patience, I still, for some reason, feel somewhat guilty about giving up. I shouldn't feel guilty; after all, I've invested my time to get through more than a fifth of the book, so it's not like I haven't paid a price. But somehow, I still do.

What I also feel, besides guilt, is concern. I wonder if my manuscript will keep the reader interested after the first fifth is over. I think it will, but is that enough? How can I really be sure?

I'll be taking Lisey's Story to the local used book store. And because I treat my books with kid gloves, they'll probably be delighted to put it on their shelf.

In any case, while I'm pondering those thoughts, I have started a new novel, a debut novel, in fact, from Joe Hill. Heart-Shaped Box is about a man who finds a strange online auction offering the chance to buy the ghost of the seller's step-father. The lead character buys the ghost (shipped in a heart-shaped box), thinking that he'll enjoy the novelty of claiming that he's made such an odd purchase. But things don't quite go as planned....

It's an interesting concept and I've read some early positive reviews about it. While this isn't Hill's first published fiction, it is his first published novel, so there's the bonus of getting to read a first major work. I hope that one-fifth of the way through this one, I'll agree with all of those great reviews.

And that brings me to the next Willoughby Poll. You're reading a book and while you give it what you consider a noble effort, you're just can't get into it. How long will you give it to pique your interest? When you think of a reader giving it the "old college try," what does that mean to you?

The responses are somewhat tongue-in-cheek, but pick the one that's generally closest to what you'd do. Vote now!

Valentine's Day Writing Gifts, Anyone?

The last poll asked if you had ever given, or ever would give, a custom piece of writing as a Valentine's gift for a loved one.

The response was unanimous: no one said such an idea would be out of the question. I guess that if I had voted, I probably would have been the only one. Then again, maybe the right person would have been able to elicit some kind of sweet prose out of me. If I ever find out, I'll be sure to let you know.

For the official results, 86% of voters said that not only would they consider doing so, they already had. The remaining 14% thought the idea was good enough that they'd seriously consider doing so.

So the big question is, did anyone actually do it this year? If so, how did it go?

Keeping Balanced (And Out of the Dog House!)

The last poll was quite interesting! I asked how well you feel you balance time with your writing and your family and friends.

No one, I'm happy to say, claims to have found the perfect balance between the two. And it seems that while we may be completely honest when it comes to answering poll questions, we're not very good to our significant others: 89% of those who responded admitted that their loved ones often take a back seat to the writing.

That may be good for the career, but not so good for the home life. Since we're just a few days away from Valentine's Day, this might be a good time to start planning ways to make up to the spouse for being so unavailable while locked in your writing office all those hours.

The new poll asks whether you ever would (or ever have) come out of your writing space with a special piece of writing in hand to make amends. After answering the poll, do you have any special plans for February 14th or the weekend after? A cozy dinner for two? A weekend getaway without the laptop or legal pad? Or even a promise to give him or her all of your attention for a day or two?

How Do You Treat Your Books?

This week's edition of Booking Through Thursday focuses on the care one takes of the books they own.

1. Are you careful with the spines? Or do you crack your books open to make them lay flat?

I try to be very meticulous when it comes to not breaking the spines of books I own. There are paperback books I've read that you can barely tell I've touched. I am amazed at the condition of books I see at used book stores.

2. Do you use bookmarks? Or do you dog-ear the corners? If you do use bookmarks, do you use those fashionable metal ones? Or paper?

I use bookmarks. Anyone who would dog-ear a corner of a book I had loaned to them would never be loaned another of my books! I usually use either paper (or card stock) bookmarks or I'll just take a scrap of paper and make a quick and dirty place holder.

3. Do you write in your books? Ever? If you do, do you make small marks, or write in as much blank space as you can find? Pen or pencil? Highlighter? Your name on the front page?

I almost never write in a book I own. I don't know why, but it just feels somehow disrespectful. The exception was always textbooks, which I would write additional notes or highlight. But the highlighting thing only works to a point...the more you highlight, the less effective highlighting becomes. My dad will highlight (or underline) whole passages or chapters of reference books he's reading, for reasons that I have yet to figure out.

4. Do you toss your books on the floor? Into bookbags? Or do you treat them tenderly, with respect?

I don't "toss" them anywhere. If I take one to work with me, I might place it in my laptop case, but my books generally don't leave home because that's where I do the most reading.

5. Do you ever lay your book face-down, to save your place?

No. If I have no bookmark, I'll grab a piece of mail and hold my place that way.

6. Um--water? Do you bathe with your books? Hold them with wet hands? Read out in the rain? Anything of that sort?

I take showers, so trying to read a book there probably wouldn't be a good idea. Reading in the rain? Does anyone do that? I might read inside while it's raining outside, but I don't see any appeal in reading while you're being rained on.

7. Are your books lined up on a bookshelf? Or crammed in any which way? Stacked on the floor?

My books are on bookshelves (though at the moment they're still in boxes). They're lined up fairly neatly, but depending on the depth of the bookcase, I might line up paperbacks two-deep.

8. Do you make a distinction--as regards book care--between hardcovers and paperbacks?

I take care of both equally, but I have a higher regard for the hardcovers because they cost so much more.

9. And, to recap? Naturally, you love all of your books, but how, exactly? Are your books loved in the battered way of a well-loved teddy bear, or like a cherished photo album or item of clothing that's used, appreciated, but carefully cared for?

Hmm...probably closer to an item of clothing that's used, but carefully cared for.

10. Any additional comments?

I wish used bookstores would give a bigger credit for books in "near-pristine" condition. Maybe some do, but none that I've visited seem to have such a policy.

Can One Word Really Ruin a Novel?

That's the question put forth by a reviewer in the Guardian about a book I'm reading.

Or at least trying to read. (I'm listening to it on audiobook, but I also have a hard copy that I find myself pawing through to try to make sense of a few things.)

I'm giving it the old college try. I'm attempting to stay optimistic. I'm waiting as patiently as I can wait -- and admittedly, patience is not my strong suit -- for something. I don't know exactly what it is I'm waiting for, but I'll know it when I hit it.

The book is Lisey's Story by Stephen King. Lisey (it rhymes with "see-see") has just lost her husband, a novelist. She's going through his papers, recalling memories. She understands, according to the dust jacket's description, that's a place her husband went that terrified and healed him, "that could eat him alive or give him the ideas that he needed to live." Now, because that's what the story is about, Lisey must go there herself to learn something about her husband. And maybe something about herself, too...I'm just guessing there, but it seems only logical.

The word that relates to the title of this post and the Guardian's review is a euphemism for the "f-word." It's "smuck." Usually, it appears as smucking.

It is supposed to reveal the "interior language" of marriage...those little things married couples say to each other that have a meaning all their own. I don't think the fact that I'm not married has anything to do with the problems I'm having getting into the story. I have "interior language" with close friends I've known for 10 years or more. I get what that's about. But maybe it's that such words sometimes only work for the people involved, not third parties.

Maybe the constant use of the word was supposed to be cute while drawing us into the middle of their glorious relationship.

But it has managed has literally turn me off from the story to the point that I don't want to read or hear another smucking paragraph for fear that I'll see the smucking word again! Like the reviewer, it's not pulling me in, it's pushing me out!

It's not cute. It's annoying as ... you know.

So has anyone read this book? Is it worth pressing on? Does King finally get the smuck over the word, or am I going to have to encounter it for the next 400 pages?

And while we're on the subject of novels that just aren't doing it for you, exactly how long do you generally give such a book before you just chunk it and move on to something else?

Reading Habits

This week's question:

What are your reading habits? Do you tend to read at specific times during the day, or does it vary from day to day, hour to hour, minute to minute?

My reading habits are completely inconsistent, with one exception: I do most of my reading while I'm driving.

No, I don't hold a novel behind my steering wheel. I listen to audiobooks. I love them. I almost always have one running.

When I'm home, I find it hard to sit still long enough to read a book, though I enjoy reading books. How's that for strange? I haven't been diagnosed with any kind of attention-deficit disorder...in fact, it was ruled out when I went to a psychologist a while back. But I guess there are times when I have this need to be doing something besides sitting still reading.

If I'm really into a book, I can sit for a good while without even noticing time is passing by. No one author has pulled me in this way, though.